Ibu Rahayu's Talk - 25th Night of Ramadhan

Wisma Subud Cilandak

Talk Ref: 00 CDK 1

Provisional Translation by Raymond Lee

Brothers and sisters whom I respect, may the peace and blessings of Almighty God be with you.

Without knowing it, brothers and sisters, we have reached the 25th day of our fast. As you know, this is the final week when the nights of the odd numbered days, are the nights of miracles when God bestows the "Lailatul Qodar".

And on these nights, we have listened to Bapak's talks. I hope that those talks, even though you have heard them many times before, will serve as a reminder to us to live a life that accords with the Will of Almighty God.

As a result of our fast, which is also supplemented by our worship of God through the latihan, I pray that during these nights we will receive something, even if it is something small. Praise God, if it is something big, a gift from God which of course God will give in line with your own situation and needs.

What we call the "Lailatul Qodar" is not like Santa Claus handing out presents, but God will of course give something that accords with your intention and how well you have carried out God's command, God's Command, that we carry out once a year during the fasting month. In fact, when we recall that our lives are full of all kinds of activity, of course we cannot just emphasise the fast. But let this fast be a reminder for all of us that although we live in this world accompanied by our desires, don't become a slave to your own desires.

But don't think then that your desires are unimportant for your life. When I gave my explanation (99CDK4) about the lower selves or "sukma" apparently many of you didn't understand. I have had many questions along the lines of "Is my latihan from my desires, or my soul, or my lower selves?"

If in your latihan you sincerely present yourself to God, there's no need to be concerned whether the latihan is from your soul or your lower selves. If your latihan is guided by Almighty God, then your latihan is the latihan! So don't think or worry about whether it is guided by your desires or your lower selves. It's not! During the latihan you are guided by the Power of God.

Where you get confused between your soul and your desires is in your everyday lives, where it is indeed hard to know whether something comes from your desires or your soul.

This is why it is very necessary for you to do latihan regularly. Because it is through the latihan that you can feel for yourself your own development and if your latihan has reached the stages of understanding and awareness, you will be able to tell the difference between what is from desires and what is not.

So you don't need to be afraid because of course you need your lower forces. It's just that once we do latihan and once we try to become the master of our own being, don't keep on being carried away by the lower forces which form your desires and always participate in everything we do in this world.

However, if you cannot rein in the free run of your desires, the one who will pay is your own self. As a consequence, your endeavour to become a person with the qualities of Susila Budi Dharma, will not be realised. Because the growth of a human being that has been touched by the power of God is always close to God, in that there is no gap between you and God's power. So when we do something wrong, through our understanding and feelings, we will know we have made a mistake and God will know too, of everything we do.

Even if you try to deny it, every part of your being will bear witness to your actions while you are in this world, at the time they come to face the power of God. This is why I urge that you must make an effort if you want to become a good person. So follow what is good, what is noble. Then it will not just be outer show, but your inside and outside will be the same.

To join Subud is easy, but to become a Subud person is not. Because, as I said just now, if we recall that Subud means Susila, Budi and Dharma, this reflects that a person will have the qualities of Susila Budi and Dharma to the highest degree.

So if you claim to be a Subud person but you still like to argue, you are still deceitful, or you take other people's things, you are still far from what you claim to be as a Subud member.

Indeed it is a great disappointment that, for example, within this Subud association where we all worship God together and where we should come to latihan just for latihan, just to worship Almighty God, yet there are still people who do undesirable things in Subud.

Because these actions which appear to be trivial can teach you. If you keep on doing it, you will become a bad person, and if that is the case, what did you join Subud for?

Well, brothers and sisters, this concerns matters which concern our lives in this world. Indeed in life, it happens that some people have a hard time and others have an easy time, but this does not give you the right to take someone else's property.

Maybe some of you have the wrong impression; that because Subud is like a family, if we fight, for example, or if we lie to another Subud member, or if we take things from our friends in Subud, it is not a big deal. But you need to know, as I explained just now, that these little habits, which you may feel don't harm anyone, if we don't try to contain them or stop them, will form our character in a way that is difficult to change.

Because these character traits are not your own. They are character traits formed out of your desires, which come from the lower forces which deliberately always tempt and disturb the resolve and constancy of your inner heart.

And once these character traits take control of you, when you have children, they are passed on to your children. Your children are in fact innocent, but your descendants are affected by what you do during your life in this world.

This is also an illustration of what happened to our parents. So if indeed you have a difficult nature, maybe that nature is not your own, but it is inherited, or you got it from your ancestors.

So with this latihan you are given the chance to repair and clean what you have that is not truly your own. So become as fine as you can while God still gives you this chance while you live in this world.

Because this latihan is not just a purification, but you will also be prepared - a preparation to witness the power of God that has guided you. And we experience as well that we are prepared to face God later on when the time comes to leave this coarse body and live the life of our soul which is inside us.

Indeed, we cannot see our soul, and this body of ours does not understand what the soul is like. But your soul knows you. So when you are ready, your soul will fill the parts of you that are prepared. There is no need to command it, you don't need to invite it, you don't need to study how. Whatever part of you is ready, will be filled by your soul. Your soul will fill every nook and cranny of what you have within you.

This is why when you do latihan, don't just make movements, but feel to what extent or how far your soul has penetrated each part of you. Your soul can even fill your hair, which may appear to be lifeless, but your soul can enter it!

I will tell you an experience, but not everyone will have this. When I ascended, there was a place that I could not reach. Then I saw the cuttings of my hair come and I knew that within my hair there was a soul, and this soul could speak to me. "Walk on your own hair so that you can reach your destination".

So brothers and sisters, this is a true experience as a witness that whatever we have is a form of life. So even your hair, even your nails are alive.. Bapak used to save and care for his nails by burying them in the earth.

So in the world of the soul, things may seem impossible, but they are intriguing if I tell you about them.

So this is just an example, brothers and sisters, that the soul can penetrate every part of our coarse human bodies. So don't waste what you have. For example, you have a hand, but don't use your hand for stealing. If you keep on stealing then how can your soul fill your hand. The soul will only fill what has been cleaned. What you yourself have cleaned. No one else cleans it, you clean it yourself.

Brothers and sisters, I will limit my explanation tonight to this. Because we want to have enough time for those of you who want to do testing. So if you agree, we won't do latihan tonight, but we will do testing. Some of you want to do latihan, too, but there isn't enough time.

Well in fact testing and latihan are the same. There won't be another opportunity to do testing but there are many visitors from abroad who would like to do testing while they are in Indonesia.

So I hope that you will not be disappointed. Let us prepare the hall! Maybe the men can leave now and the ladies will do testing. God willing, I will lead the testing myself. It seems that many men have approached me, "Why doesn't Ibu Rahayu test us too? We never have a chance!" Well, this is not easy for me to do. If I test you once, then you will keep asking for it, or if I go abroad, people will want me to test with the men. Well, this will not be a problem for me if it is what you really want. But don't take this to mean that women are allowed to test men or that men are allowed to test women. Don't!

I will do the testing in groups. So don't ask to be tested one by one. I am not willing to test individuals.

Thank you. Maybe the peace and blessings of God be with you.